Wednesday, January 20, 2010

There is no substitute for time

I had a very interesting conversation with a brother from Ohio over the weekend. His name is Paul and he and a few others are exploring the idea of an intentional community in the Buckeye state. What I found appealing is that a) they are starting a new group so some of the extra-biblical baggage other groups have is not present and b) Paul and others in this group have a real heart for evangelism, something that seems to oftentimes get lost with intentional communities (although in fairness, it also is by and large forgotten in traditional church settings as well).

I am not sure where this is all going. I am deeply troubled and discontented, I feel like something is missing. I think what is lacking is that we are missing the immense blessing of community among the followers of Christ, a blessing that simply requires time to enjoy. How much time do we spend with other believers each week? Two hours? Six hours? We cannot really be edified, encouraged, exhorted, admonished, uplifted as we should be in a few hours a week. It doesn’t matter if you meet in a building or a home, such limited time together is necessarily going to limit the blessing you get. Just like being a family is impossible to do in short bursts, being the church requires that we spend time together. Sometimes that leads to drudgery or frustration with one another. That is OK! If you want to see the sort of close fellowship that leads believers to set aside the worries of the world because they are confident in the community around them, you have to spend time together. The church is pretty good at coming together for one another when there is a big, public crisis. What about the little stuff that happens every day? How many people that you ”go to church with” do you know well enough to tell when they are hurting or struggling?

Does that mean spending every waking moment together? Not necessarily. Think about this though: how would your life be different if you spent a sizable portion of each and every day with other believers instead of a few scheduled times a week? Some of us have that blessing. Most of us don’t outside of our other family members. It is my contention that we actually are more reflective of the church when we are not “at church” than we do when we are “at church”, surrounded by other people who are probably doctrinally and demographically similar to ourselves. Part of the reason people get traditions so deeply entrenched in their belief system is that they hear the same thing over and over again because we seek out those who agree with us in carefully controlled and choreographed settings. Almost anyone can pretend to be pious for a couple of hours. If you want to get to know someone, you have to know them informally and over time. You need to see them lose their temper, or cry or get into a funk. That is when we really get to know one another, when we have an intimacy with one another that transcends the ritual.

We have to get away from this model that compartmentalizes “church life” as if that is a separate part of who we are, something we roll out on Sunday and Wednesday evening. I don’t know for sure what the answer is, although I am getting a clearer picture by the day. I do know that we are all by and large missing out on something critically important. We are not designed to be lone wolf Christians, taking on the world on our own. Nor are we called to be “shufflers”, shuffling into church on cue and then shuffling back out again exactly two hours later to get back to our busy lives. We are called into community. The Christian life is not an interruption to our otherwise secular lives, it is our lives. The time we spend in the world should be the interruption to the norm, not the time we spend with one another.



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7 comments:

Steve Scott said...

Arthur,

I see a self-perpetuating catch 22 going on with just what you are saying. We are too busy dealing with our own lives because nobody else will help us to help deal with other people's lives who need help because nobody will help them.

Ecclesiastes 4:9-10

Anonymous said...

Randy and I had not experienced a lot of real fellowship with other believers until we found the church we're at now. Even though most of the members live about 1/2 an hour away from us, we are often in other people's homes or they are in ours. If we're not talking to them in person, we're on the phone or e-mailing. What has been so great is that a lot of that time is spent just being social, but it is also real fellowship. We get together and pray for each other and with each other. We bear one another's burdens. We sharpen and encourage each other. I don't know that I really understood the importance of constant fellowship until I experienced it.

Alan Knox said...

Arthur,

I love the last few lines: "We are called into community. The Christian life is not an interruption to our otherwise secular lives, it is our lives. The time we spend in the world should be the interruption to the norm, not the time we spend with one another."

If we can learn to live according to what you've just said, we'll find that both we and the people we're spending time with begin to grow in maturity in Christ like we've never seen before. Of course, this assumes that the time we're spending together is actually spend trying help one another grow and not in some meaningless activity.

-Alan

Arthur Sido said...

Alan,

I think that is true. I also think that we should see some of the more mundane things of life as truly meaningful. We build up the experience of "going to church" to such an extent that we can only see God at work amidt ceremony and music and ritual. Often it seems God is at work among His people when they are engaged in meaningful but mundane activities. We don't see Him at work because it doesn't fit in with our preconceived notion of what God's presence looks like.

Arthur Sido said...

April,

That's what I am talking about! beign social IS real fellowship! You and Randy are both blessed to be part of a community that transcends "church" and bleeds over into "real life".

Anonymous said...

I don't disagree with you at all on this Arthur--just want to clarify. I don't think being social is unholy and talking about spiritual things is. I guess what I wanted to point out is that some churches have a kind of country club atmosphere. It's *just* socialization, with no deeper common bond. But I feel so blessed to have both at the same time. I had a newly married friend over the other day because she wanted some advice on being a stay-at-home wife and what that looks like. Even though our conversation didn't always sound super-spiritual, I know it was deeper than just hanging out. Even in talking about how to make chicken stock, we were fellowshipping over something real--it was fellowship, and not just hanging out, because of our common bond in Christ. Does that make sense?

Arthur Sido said...

April,

I wasn't being critical at all! I think what you said was spot on.