Tired of not having enough room on your car for your Jesus fish and your patriotic bumper stickers? Have no fear, you can get both in one great product for only $9.95! Introducing the USAFish!
The Star-Spangled Fish™ is inspired by the Christian values that uphold our great nation. The emblem is a symbolic reminder of the sacrifice Jesus made to free us from the bondage of sin and of the sacrifices made by all the brave patriots who have kept the USA free from tyranny and oppression.
Absolutely! Rising up in armed rebellion against King George and then killing others because our government said so is just like Jesus going as a lamb to the slaughter and laying down His life for His sheep. Now you may be wondering just which Christian values we are talking about here: Refusing to seek vengeance? Having all things in common so that none among us goes without? Submitting to the authorities God has placed over us (like King George)? Meekness? Humility? Equality for all (white) men?
See asking that question just means you are some sort of godless commie pinko that hates America. Everybody knows that America was founded on Christian values. All of 'em! So order your USAFish today and join the other 81,623 red-blooded Christian patriots who "liked" USAFish on their Facebook page! You can even get a USAFish lapel pin or t-shirt so that everyone who sees you walking around knows you are a good patriotic Christian. Don't be a lib'ral like our President, show the rest of the world that America is #1 in the eyes of Jesus!