As my older kids move into their teens and pre-teens, I have been pleased to see that they are developing a sense of discernment. A couple of examples:
First. I visited a friend’s church with two of my daughters and the comment after the service was over was that it seemed like a rock concert held in a church. It was clear that there was no Gospel proclamation going on. Just loud music and middle-aged guys trying to dress and act like teenagers and a “pastor” rushing through an inane “sermon” in fifteen minutes before people started getting bored.
Second. When we lived at our house in the Detroit area, a couple of women from a local Baptist church were going door to door. My wife invited them in, but while she was talking to one of the women, the other woman was trying to lead my younger children through the “sinners prayer” and pronounce them saved. My twelve year old called her on it and the lady got kind of huffy.
So some of what they hear and read is sticking. My concern is that they are not just reflecting discernment from me but also my combatitive nature. In other words, how do we teach our kids to contend earnestly without being contentious? I fear that I am teaching them that the Gospel is like a 4 D-cell maglite, it gives off bright light but you can also beat people over the head with it.
For a lot of people, that is easier than it is for others. They are naturally more easy going. But for me, my heresy radar is going all the time and even a whiff of bogus teaching, playing fast and loose with the text or applying a manmade tradition sends me into “ramming speed”. I like that my children, in a day and age of “anything goes theology” are building a sold foundation of the Biblical basics. However, the point of that foundation is not to be a club to beat people up with (“BAM! You are wrong and this is why!), but to give them a grounding in Biblical truth upon which to build.
It is no fun and not very spiritually uplifting to be looking for the negatives everywhere you go. I am hardly the only Christian who suffers from this affliction (and you know who you are), but I really don’t want to instill that in my kids. So along with reforming my own behavior, how do we teach our kids to be discerning without being disagreeable?
First. I visited a friend’s church with two of my daughters and the comment after the service was over was that it seemed like a rock concert held in a church. It was clear that there was no Gospel proclamation going on. Just loud music and middle-aged guys trying to dress and act like teenagers and a “pastor” rushing through an inane “sermon” in fifteen minutes before people started getting bored.
Second. When we lived at our house in the Detroit area, a couple of women from a local Baptist church were going door to door. My wife invited them in, but while she was talking to one of the women, the other woman was trying to lead my younger children through the “sinners prayer” and pronounce them saved. My twelve year old called her on it and the lady got kind of huffy.
So some of what they hear and read is sticking. My concern is that they are not just reflecting discernment from me but also my combatitive nature. In other words, how do we teach our kids to contend earnestly without being contentious? I fear that I am teaching them that the Gospel is like a 4 D-cell maglite, it gives off bright light but you can also beat people over the head with it.
For a lot of people, that is easier than it is for others. They are naturally more easy going. But for me, my heresy radar is going all the time and even a whiff of bogus teaching, playing fast and loose with the text or applying a manmade tradition sends me into “ramming speed”. I like that my children, in a day and age of “anything goes theology” are building a sold foundation of the Biblical basics. However, the point of that foundation is not to be a club to beat people up with (“BAM! You are wrong and this is why!), but to give them a grounding in Biblical truth upon which to build.
It is no fun and not very spiritually uplifting to be looking for the negatives everywhere you go. I am hardly the only Christian who suffers from this affliction (and you know who you are), but I really don’t want to instill that in my kids. So along with reforming my own behavior, how do we teach our kids to be discerning without being disagreeable?
11 comments:
Ouch. My toes just got a little stepped on!
"You can't exalt your own cleverness and the glory of God at the same time." - John Piper
How about being confessional?
Confessing what they believe and not speaking so much as to what they do not believe.
James, we are talking about me here, not you. Please stay focused.
Steve, that is actually very sound advice. Rather than telling someone we don't believe in the "Sinners Prayer" I should teach my kids to confess what we DO believe. Thank you for those sound words, they seem very common sense but that is something that is too often in short supply.
April,
Sorry about your toes!
Show them Jesus Arthur. I have been on the receiving end of the "I'm right and you're WRONG(BAM) hammer and it lacks love. True Biblical discernment has love and obedience to God as it's base.
If you do not love others and the Christian brother and sisters around you, then you are merely a resounding gong and clanging cymbal..(ICor 13)
I'm sticking my neck out here, because I am not a Bible scholar. I am a wife, mom and Believer in Jesus Christ.
I haven't read dozens of books nor have I been called to be a pastor.
One thing I DO have though is a deep, abiding relationship with God, through Jesus Christ, as I read His Word. That is the basis for my discernment and for my children's as well.
God's Word is alive and active. If the Word is richly dwelling in you and your children, discernment will be present not because of YOU but because of the Word of God dwelling IN you.
Sound words Bonnie.
A Bible teaching church with activities that are fun for the kids is important.
Ummmm, Arthur, you know it is common practice amongst most clinic patients to defer or transfer their conviction to the subject who has invoked those feelings.
How does that make you feel hmmmm?
Not sure what you mean, having never been in a clinic. But again, enough about you.
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